It’s the regret. The question. The ‘what if’. And the ultimate safe haven when you’re acting like a jerk according to her believes. It’s the secret every woman has.
You see, before you, there were others. And regardless of how many men she’s been with before she met you, there is the one that takes a special place in her heart. No matter how many years have passed, she’s still thinking about him from time to time.
In the moments of despair, when you two are drawing knives on each other and you’re behaving like some primitive caveman, she retreats to her safe haven. In other words, she is thinking about the romance and passion of her younger days, second-guessing her decision to spend the life with you.
And that can quickly turn into a ‘what if’ moment.
Who is that man?
You heard the name already. We are talking about the man who made her knees shiver every time she would see him. In that moment, she was ready to do whatever he asks.
Only, he wasn’t determined enough. And by the time he made up his mind, she was long gone, riding into a sunset with you.
How that fact reflects on your wife?
In a positive way, when she’s innocently daydreaming about it. It calms her down.
You have to understand that you’re not endangered by this secret in any way. Your wife loves you. But this is a special part of her past that she simply cannot let go.
She’s aware that the guy simply lacked the qualities she found in you and that’s enough for her. As far as she’s concerned, he is just a faded memory of some younger, maybe even happier days where she was exploring the world.
Every time you act like an asshole, guess who’s popping in her mind?
And you know how they say: what you focus on expands. Hence, more time she spends thinking about that man, more she’s focusing on him.
What are the odds that she’ll cheat on you with him?
Every time the two of you arrive in the town of her youth, she is occasionally seeing that man.
You walked just pass by him on more than one occasion. She made sure that she’s behind you to exchange that old look she knows all too well. In the past, before you, that look was the signal. The cue that he’s waiting for her in their place.
And don’t forget that we are talking about the man who never truly let her go. She is his biggest regret. He failed to catch her in a critical moment because he hesitated.
Will he make the move after all these years? Will she play along?
If you create the environment, all bets are off!
Keep that in mind every time you abuse her, neglect her or take her for granted. There’s someone out there who won’t repeat the same mistake twice.