How Your In-Shower Rituals Can Tell Who You Are.

Written by Steven Hawk

 What you’re washing first, determines your character

There are lots of cues people are unconsciously using upon which you can judge someone’s intelligence, level of narrow or open-mindedness and the overall character. You just need to know what those cues are and how to recognize them.

But how can you self-analyze? Who exactly are you? What cues are you using?

Did you know that you can tell that just by acknowledging the very first thing you wash in the shower?

It may sound funny, but as you’ll see, the bathing ritual will describe you in details.

I wash my HAIR first because, well, that’s my thing

shutterstock_325010396Artists and creative types are usually washing their hair first. You’re a dreamer. It’s your hidden passion. But in the same time, you can achieve things other people can’t even dream of. You do lack a bit of persistence and discipline and maybe some hardcore dedication, but you’re ready to work relentlessly to accomplish your goals and plans.

Money is not so important to you and that may easily be the problem you know that exists but you were unable to pinpoint it until now. If you would only improve this segment of your life, you would reach unimaginable heights. Money is important. It’s a tool and a weapon. Your ancient ancestors used spears and different tools to survive and secure food and shelter for their families. In our time, those tools and weapons come under the joint name – money.

We use it same as they used spears and arrows. We use it to live a life beyond the wildest expectations of our ancestors. Money allowed us to push the limits of comfort.

So perhaps it’s time to change your perspective. Who knows where it will take you. Do you dare to miss that chance? We have a limited time on this planet and what we do with that time, determines the level of our happiness and the overall quality of our lives. And no matter what you and others may think, money plays the predominant role in both.

Let’s move forward.

You friend up mostly with intellectuals and other creative minds and you’re always prepared to explore and indulge your partner.

Talent is your main strength so cherish it and direct it in valuable causes. Connect with the nature and perhaps even explore spiritual dimensions to gain more strength and boost that natural creativity.

And when it comes to a perfect partner, look up for the woman who starts her bathing with – breasts.

For some strange reason, the first thing I wash are my CHEST

shutterstock_289413590Who knows man, maybe you weren’t breastfed enough and now you have a nasty habit of twisting your own nipples. Joke aside, let’s see who you are, you big nasty nipple lower.  If you wash your chest before everything else, it may indicate that you’re the person who stands firmly on the ground; more of a practical dude. You’re simple, honest and do not hesitate. To you, two most important traits are: practicality and simplicity.

You hate when someone disrupts you in the middle of your “session” where you are focused like a cliffhanger. It appears that you don’t have much patience for people who don’t see the things like you are.

In fact, you hardly ever can tolerate some bullshit statement and claim that hasn’t been backed up with any solid proof. That can be a real pain in the butt for your partner from time to time. But she’s tolerating your behavior because deep inside she knows how dedicated and devoted partner you are. She knows that you’re ready to sacrifice your own comfort to please her. And that’s all she needs.

But do try to relax a bit. Be more spontaneous and more patient. Loosen up a bit and loose that control freak in you from time to time. You’ll see how life will become funnier and more enjoyable.

Your constant need to control things and disability to trust the others to do it right will come to collect sooner or later. You’re exposing your body to immense stress without any good reason. And that’s not a proper way to live this limited time we have on this planet. You really don’t need all that cortisol.

When it comes to a perfect lifetime companion, ask the woman what she’s washing first (that won’t be awkward at all…) and if the hair is her thing, buy her a dinner.

When I step under that refreshing stream of hot water, the first thing I want to deal with are my ARMPITS

How about you trim some of that hair? It will reduce the odor for sure. But on the other hand, maybe you’re seeking for a mate who gets off on the bush under the man’s arms.

If you wash your armpits first, that indicates the reliable and hardworking man. You do misjudge people from time to time in your effort to assess the person’s true intentions and that backfired many times in the past, but that’s something most people do. It’s hard to tell if someone is being honest or just want to use you for some selfish agendas.

You’re a hardy man with many talents and if you would only make your pick and really focus on one of those talents, your life will change radically. And since you’re so focused on work, you tend to appear naïve because for some reason, you trust people even though you know how many of them are nothing more than deceiving pricks, trying to screw you over the moment you provide them with the opportunity.

Try to find more self-time and maybe explore some spiritual stuff like meditation to settle down a bit. You’ve been working too hard and your body would surely use some time off. In the long run, this simple habit will help you to become more powerful and happier.

If you’re not sure about your pick when it comes to women, try to find out if some of your “targets” are washing their shoulders first. Concentrate on those.

Same as I’m doing it in the morning, I’m washing my FACE first when in the shower

You can’t wash the age my man. Plastic surgery can but that’s for girls. Your face reflects the wisdom you gathered during your lifetime so let it be.

If the face is your first pick, you find predominant importance in money and you’re willing to go through the trouble to get it. Being surrounded with the people you can use for your personal benefits is something you’ve been practicing since you were just a small boy.

But sometimes, when you get overwhelmed with the everyday stress, you come to think how life is nothing more but one real pain in the butt. Others don’t get you from time to time, but you don’t give a shit about their opinion anyway.

You have a tendency for daydreaming, appearing self-oriented to the people who are watching you. In their minds, you’re just another egocentric person who thinks about self only.

That daydreaming is the direct result of your wild imagination which subsequently leads to many different wishes. It’s sometimes hard to make the pick.

Try to soften up a bit. Try to loosen up and relax. Be more “accessible” in communication, contacts and relationships in general. Don’t act like a boner 24/7. Do some volunteering. That will help you to loosen up a bit.

Your potentials are indescribable and it would be great if you could introduce some raw discipline and maybe exploit those potentials. You only need determination and perseverance. How hard can it be?

What’s your ideal woman? What she’s washing the moment she steps under the shower with you? Well, it appears that she doesn’t have any particular pick or some specific part of the body. We could say that she falls into the group of “miscellaneous.”

Don’t know about the rest of you guys, but when I’m under the shower, I first take care of my king down there. My dick is my priority!

Easy tiger. There’s nothing wrong with taking care of the manhood first. You’re gonna need it anyway, after the shower so make sure you clean it up good and maybe spray some perfume afterwards. She’ll get close and maybe even in lip/mouth contact with it so why not making it irresistible?


There’s something about you that you don’t like to openly admit, isn’t that right?

You have serious issues with keeping the concentration. It appears that you’re wasting it all around ya. It can be a pain in the ass problem, just to answer few simple questions when talking with someone on the phone.

And when someone disturbs your zen, you’re ready to commit the murder. You don’t like to be disturbed in any way because it fucks up your thinking process and you forget what you wanted to do next. Shit, you can even forget where you headed.

You’re not naïve but there are situations when it appears like that because you “don’t fire that quick.”

People simply don’t know how to handle you. You’re the ultimate puzzle so it doesn’t really matter what she’s washing first. She won’t be able to make you happy anyway, right?

Dick comes later. The first thing I’m washing are my SHOULDERS

When we talk about responsibility, we are talking about you. You’re the guy that will give everything he’s got when something has to be done. They do think of you as of a cocky bastard because you spend much of your time in solitude, but that’s just the way to re-charge your batteries. Don’t hold it against them, because they don’t know any better.

You need your alone time to get your shit together, don’t you?

And once people get to really know you, they stick with you for the lifetime.

Money and power are important for you, but not some crucial thing in life. Sure, you know how to make money and that fact alone is what makes the pursuit for money so unattractive.

When it comes to love, you’re faithful and stable. But do try to lay off from time to time and to loosen those strings. Go outside and breathe some fresh air.

Think armpits when thinking about ideal partner my man!

It appears that I’m the “MISCELLANEOUS” guy…

You have your virtues, but the thing is: others are having real problems recognizing them. Deep inside you’re a good person with very few flaws.

It’s time to start living more adventurous. Explore the world around you and respond to challenges. Let that adrenaline surge from time to time in a positive way. Present your potentials to other people. Help them to learn you for who you truly are.

The key to relationship improvement with other folks is emphasizing your own virtues and not hiding the flaws and imperfections.

When we talk about intimate relationships and love in particular, we come to a problem. In your imagination, you’re passionate and intuitive, but in real life, that fear of failure you have can sometimes mess up your mood. You simply can’t relax enough.

Start working on your inner development for those potentials to surface!

If you’re wondering about the perfect partner, think face. Yes…she’ll wash her face first and that’s the one you should focus on.


So…did you recognize yourself in one of the proposed categories? Funny, isn’t it? Something that simple and yet so powerful that you can tell much about the person just by knowing the first thing that’s been taken care of under the shower.


About the author

Steven Hawk