You might not be aware of it, but one of our two primary fears is most likely blocking your progress by causing severe procrastination and total regression. It’s the fear of the unknown and we all have it, without exceptions. Simply put, we just don’t like exposing ourselves to the situations where our cortisol and adrenaline levels are peaking and our bodies are going through immense stress.
OK, now you’re thinking, bullshit, I ain’t suffering from that crap…that’s for pussies and I’m no pussy goddammit!
Nobody says you are, but the fear of the unknown is a constant threat to your well-being if you don’t react and apply the solution.
Don’t fool yourself, it is an issue and no man is immune to it. And it does cause procrastination.
For example, after years of being constantly rejected by your wife, you have developed a certain level of aversion, As the result, you are frequently shying away from asking for sex. It’s happening because your brain is anticipating the negative response and thus, wants to prevent you from being exposed to any kind of a negative stress. It will simply divert your attention to something else entirely.
How do you recognize a procrastination problem caused by the fear of the unknown in a normal working or living environment?
Do you feel the increased heartbeat and a sudden surge of heat all over your body when you find yourself challenged in any way? Do you become anxious and nervous, with hands all sweaty, when you face a serious dilemma?
We are not talking about the life or death situation here. We’re talking about a private and/or professional decision when you’re well aware that your choice or even a simple question will make a certain impact – negative or positive.
Those symptoms are triggered by one of our primordial fears – the fear of the unknown. In other words, taught by a few previous experiences your brain is now anticipating the stressful situation and as a measure of precaution it shuts down your willpower to even try it. It’s better for your general well-being if you just sit around and watch the TV. Just because you are not entirely sure what kind of a response is waiting for you. It’s the unknown.
What’s happening inside your body in those moments that is now frequently causing procrastination?
Our brain is not evolved to the state where it can distinct some everyday issue that cannot lead to health or life risk from some serious death threat. We have only one response and one mechanism to deal with everything:
The mechanism is always the same whether you’re facing more or less serious dilemma or you’re facing three tugs in a dark alley. Once the situation is recognized as a threat, the brain activates the stress hormone cortisol (the stage 1 of the fight-or-flight response).
Your heartbeat rate is increasing, your pupils are widening, blood pressure is rising and oxygenation levels are above normal. In other words, your body is put in a state of readiness. Adrenaline and a few other hormones are taking care of the rest and in less than a second, you’re ready to decide. Will you fight? Or will you fly away?
If you have a habit of shying away from stressful situations, you will simply cave in which will trigger the procrastination and even a severe case of acute depression. Your body reaction in past was just too severe and almost impossible to handle. So if you were forced into the situation against your free will, your responses were less than optimal.
The reason why this is happening to so many people is simple: when the fight-or-flight mechanism is on, some systems are down and that mostly goes to those processes that are not vital for your current survival.
One of those knocked out systems is a neocortical region of your brain responsible for slow and detailed calculations. That means that you’re using only your fast thinking or your instinctive reactions!
Why do you expect to reach a good decision if your “smart and wise” part of the brain is not active?
How to control this mechanism?
Smartasses are saying that you should change the fear of the unknown into curiosity. At least that’s something I’ve read most recently.
I would like to ask the smartass who came up with that nonsense how the fuck to convert the primordial fear, so emphasized at some people that they’re shivering when asked simplest questions into simple, childish curiosity?
Ah, yes, they were talking about the cooking and shit.
We, on the other hand, are talking about the situation where the decision-making process is causing your ballz to retreat all the way up and hide behind the kidneys.
That’s the real issue, not some bullshit cooking or should I ask her out or not. Ask her out, for fuck’s sake. She ain’t gonna kill ya.
When all things are considered, facing the fear emerges as the most likely solution.
But how the hell are you supposed to do that?
You see, you’re already dead. Nothing but a walking corp. Your time on this goddamn planet is ridiculously reduced and minimized to only 20-30 most fertile years.
At any given moment you can become history.
This is how you live through the years of the warfare without suffering PTSD. You embrace the fact that you’re already a dead man who’s just using life credits to live another day. What could possibly be worse than that?
It’s the philosophy of the warrior.
Now, there is a neat way to use this philosophy in everyday life and stop procrastination forever.
Once you make your peace with the fact that you’re dead, you start thinking about the day ahead of you. And I mean really think about it. Create a mental image of it every morning.
The funny thing is: you know 90% of your day ahead.
Just try to do it for a few mornings and you’ll see how easy it is to predict the possible outcome of every decision you’re about to make that day. What was once the unknown suddenly becomes known.
Let’s test this through the most common example…
Constantly avoiding asking for a raise or a promotion? Because you are afraid of boss’ reaction and rejection?
Don’t be. Just concentrate and create a vivid mental image of the conversation to remove as many unknowns as possible. In other words, prepare yourself just like you are preparing for the job interview, for example! As the result, you will appear more confident and that alone will tip the scale in your favor. Even if your request meets rejection you will feel good about yourself for giving a shot. The dopamine shot you’ll receive for growing the ballz to finally stand in front of your boss and openly ask for a promotion or a raise will feel rewarding and boost your self-confidence – something that can’t happen when you don’t even try.
Come unprepared, on the other hand, and shiver or stutter while talking and your boss will smell the pussy. As you know, pussies just don’t get promotions.
There’s a profound difference between being rejected when feeling confident and when being insecure. Two quite opposite chemical consequences. First is the positive with the dopamine and serotonin activation. The second is negative with the inhibition of these two life-important brain chemicals.
Remember: you’re already dead. So why the fuck are you so scared to live?