If you’re tired of the same situation unfolding, maybe it’s time to change your way of thinking. Here’s 5 ways being an ass – can actually get the girl, and not a disappearing act.
1) Don’t be Available All The Time
Popular to contrary belief, ladies don’t want a man who jumps at every opportunity. In fact, they prefer someone who plays hard to get – at least some of the time. As a nice guy, you’re probably fallen for the same trap. She sends you a text and you answer. She wants to meet up and you’re available. She loves pandas and you find a stuffed bear to bring next time you see her.
When you’re accessible 100% of the time she needs (or wants) you, it’s no longer a chase. Women enjoy knowing they have to work for your attention. They enjoy knowing that you have a life with friends or family commitments. In other words, they enjoy knowing that you’re not just sitting around waiting for her to act.
2) Cancel Plans on Her… Occasionally
Before thousands of men start bailing on dinner engagements with her family, remember there is a time and place for everything—important events are not one of them. That being said, if you have plans to grab coffee and saunter around the park, having something come up (think “friend having a shitty day”) can actually strengthen the charge between you. Keep your rescheduling a few hours in advance, so she’s not waiting on you though – as that’s not going to win any points.
3) Tell Her No – And Mean It
Don’t feel like seeing that cheesy movie? Tell her no. Seriously. It’s okay to stand up for yourself, even if it means she pouts for a bit. Chances are, she’ll get over it quickly and move on to enjoying herself after a few moments. Remember, it might be a simple move, but telling her how you really feel about wanting to do something shows confidence and honesty. Women enjoy men who know what they want – and aren’t afraid to tell her.
4) Show Your Competitive Side
If you’re always taking it easy on her on dates, stop. Being competitive is important in any relationship, especially if you’re just starting out. Venture out into something you enjoy and show her what you’re made of. Games like bowling, darts, go karting or mini golf are all prime examples of games you can get into, without physically hurting her in a physical game.
Taunt her a little bit if you do end up winning, but don’t drag it into the point of being a sore loser. There’s nothing wrong with being competitive, but know when to shut up and move on.
5) Stop Asking So Many Questions
Everyone loves talking about themselves and women are no exception to this rule. While it’s important to know details about her, stop asking so much about her. By refusing to encourage the “self-talk”, you’ll show that you’re not overly interested in the details. That’s not to say you can’t ever ask, but the idea is to keep her wondering. While you’re at it, keep details about your life minimal too – enjoy the night, the connection and the wine – save deep conversations for another time.